So, today we 're talking about my son. I love him more than life and love and accept everything about him. He has a lot of difficulties in his life which are going to continue to make his life harder throughout life. One week after my lying-cheating-hopefully-soon-to-be-ex-husband told me he was leaving me, my son climbed into bed with me to tell me he was "mad at me". I asked him why, expecting an answer such as " You wouldn't let me stay up late last night" or "you wouldn't let me have dessert". Boy was I wrong. Instead my son proceeded to tell me that I wouldn't buy him girl clothes, let him grow his hair out, and that his name is Samantha.
My first reaction was to roll over, look at the ceiling and ask God: "Now? You give this to me now?!?" My second thought was: "But I don't like the name Samantha...." With that thought I knew I would be able to come to terms with any gender issues that might have arisen, or are yet to come. I mean, if my strongest reaction is to the name, come on. So I said "ok" can we talk about the name? I explained that I didn't have the money to buy him new clothes, but that girls wear shirts and sweatpants too. He seemed ok with that, talking about the hair, I have told him that he can grow out his hair if he wants, but that we need to brush it everyday to take care of it. This was over a year ago and he still has short hair. He still hates it, but hates brushing out the knots and snarls he gets when it starts to get longer more.
I got in touch with friends to get information about transgenders and how best to support William in this. The good news is he's told my mom that if he grows up to be a girl, he will change his name to Willow. Much better.
I have always said I would love and accept my son no matter if he were heterosexual or homosexual. Now I am adding transgendered to that list.
Here's where it gets interesting, this past year, we role play all the time. I don't ever get to be mommy unless he's getting out of the bath and wants help drying off, or needs me to assist with wiping after a bm. Usually I get to play a boy, I have been Luigi from Mario brothers, and more recently I am Brock from Pokemon. William is the girl, princess Daisy from Mario, and recently different Pokemon trainers. We are either dating or married in our play. Oedipus much? While at my parents house, playing, I was Luigi, William was my wife Daisy, and my parents were Mario and Peach. Daisy proceeded to tell me that sometimes she was in love with Peach as well. What the @%#$? Now I have the possibility of having a son who is heterosexual, homosexual, transgendered, and possibly a transgendered lesbian? Really? I love him, and will always accept him, but for just this minute, really??? GOD, now? you give this to me now? with everything else? really? No, honestly, it's a joke right?
Ok, that's out of my system. I do love him and wouldn't trade him for another child for anything, he makes my heart sing and smile. Sorry you had to witness my melt down, but sometimes it's a little too much. Well, thanks for reading, hope I made you smile, until next time.......